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AND WTF I totally forgot about my account of When The Black Parade Came to Town, Part III!!! I fail. I suck. I need to finish that pronto.
GOD so basically i'm bumming, but it's not usual everyday bumming. No, it's end-of-the-school-year bumming. It happens every year! And isn't it ironic how the end of the school year is what I anticipate since day one, and then once it gets here I start feeling really emo about it? Don't get me wrong, there is NO WAY I would wish for the year to rewind and start all over again--HELL NO. But all of the freaking memories...To be honest, this year was probably the most boring year ever, and I don't have THAT many great memories to speak of...But you can't help missing those kind of things, right? It's not like a "Ooh I won't see most of my friends for 3 whole months" kind of feeling, but a "Fuck. Another year, gone. Nothing will ever be the same. Fuck." kind of feeling.
Case in point: Fucking Ryan.
Will I ever GET OVER this bloke? I don't know...In a way, I don't want to ever get over him...And then again, I don't want him to own my heart forever. That sounded cheesy to the extreme, but that's really how it is. Sure, I can LIKE some other guy, maybe just think they're cute or sweet, BUT NEVER, EVER have I come even remotely close to liking them in the way I do Ryan. I am in freaking love with him. I'm serious.
And you know what really sucks? How he pretty much has paid ZERO attention to me this whole second semester. Well, zero compared to how much we talked and stuff first semester. Seriously, we could not get through 5 minutes in class without saying something to eachother--even if we were across the class--or making faces, or passing drawings back and forth, or giving eachother a random high-five...Those were the DAYS. Even if sometimes I didn't feel all swoony around him, it was good to know that he thought of me as a friend, at least.
And he was so goddamned sweet. He still is, but when we were more of "friends" it was just amazing. All the time, he was always so happy and so sweet. To this day I've never seen him be anything less than that. I still remember when he'd get to class early and I'd be sitting there and instead of gallabanting off with his friends until the bell rang, he'd stay there and talk to me. Once I was sleeping on my desk--and seriously I was sleeping--and suddenly I felt a hand gently tickling my neck. YEAH HE TOUCHED MY NECK WHEN I WAS SLEEPING. And of course I completely freaked out and embarassed myself half to death when I saw it was him. (I forgot what his exact explanation for that action was, but I think he wanted to wake me up without scaring me ((so fucking sweet)), though he still succeeded to frighten me) Would he EVER do anything like that anymore? NO WAY. Or that time at lunch when we walked around the track together and he was so honest and sincere about everything with he and Tara (*cough* his girlfriend and one of the greatest people ever) and then HE ASKED for my phone number...and he never, ever called me.
Nowadays, I don't even know if you could consider us friends, at least not outside of class. It's such a fucking pity. I mean all last year in Spanish we were good friends, but ONLY inside class. And this year I finally started to think that we'd become REAL friends--because to be honest, if we can never be "together", then we at least should be friends, that's all I'm asking for...But now everything that happened at the beginning of the year is shot to pieces. It's like it never happened. We never even have real conversations in class anymore, if we even talk to eachother at all. No more drawings or notes, no more high-fives--the closest he's even come to physically touching me is taking my homework from my desk to copy!!! YEAH. And I'll never forget when we sat right next to eachother, that one day when we were both wearing scarves. I had on my fleecy plaid scarf, and he had an awesome houndstooth one. He looked at me during class and just realized that we both were wearing scarves and he was like, "Hey we both have scarves. Cool." and he played with the end of his and smiled. And I was just being a loser and said, "Uh huh, very cool. I like yours. We should switch!" And he looked at me funny, and said, in a voice that I could tell he was trying not to sound like a jerk in, "But...I want my scarf." ....UGH. I think I said something stupid like, "Oh--oh yeah, uh you keep yours, I'll keep mine."
FUUUUCK. I felt like such a retard. I couldn't bear to look at him all class. I bet Tara gave him that scarf...
Anyways, I'm getting really sick just thinking about how much I've said about him in here for the past hour almost. Trust me, I could go on and on. But I have stuff to get done. Basically, the whole situation with him right now is I love him just as much as I did since the day I first saw him--almost two years ago--and I'm terrified I won't stop just because I have never felt this way about anyone before. Patrick from 8th grade is the only person who comes close. Basically...I know he'll never want to be anything more than a classroom friend with me. But it seemed like he did want to be more for some time...What did I do wrong?
I should have snagged him when I had the chance.
- Mood:
crushed
Keep in mind I am trying to make this as descriptive of the evening as possible for MY SAKE only, and my furrylicious friend in Colorado, if she really gives a damn.
6:30 PM
Half an hour to go. Brittney had already returned, proudly bearing her Black Parade shirt (although she claimed the Rise Against shirts were "cuter"). Finally everyone was standing up and that's when it got cutthroat for the best spots, but we luckily managed to keep our places. Or WAS it so lucky...?
We stood around and had small talk with a short young lass who attended Jewish school and had 13981203929 pictures of Gerard on her phone. And to make things worse (but more hilarious) she blurted out nervously to us, "THIS IS MY FIRST CONCERT EVER!!!" Yes she was annoying, and thinking back it makes me feel sick that I even spoke to such a fucking typical teeniebop. Still...it didn't bother me. Nothing could bother me that night.
Feet already becoming sore from just standing in one place, we sang along to the same three songs that played for a good 40 minutes: Paint it Black, Another Brick in the Wall, and Basket Case. Now understand these songs are classic favorites, yet I couldn't help but feel just a TAD annoyed to hear the cut versions on loop for so long, especially when all anyone wanted was MCR.
But we weren't there just yet...
7:15 PM
Basket Case stops abruptly. The lights go out and the crowd goes from zero to through the roof in a matter of seconds as the Rise Against symbol flashes in blue light on the stage. And then it seems out of nowhere they appear--just feet away!! And the next moment I feel elbows jabbing my rib cage, feet crushing ontop of mine, and a flabby gut shoving me forward.
I can't deny it felt awesome.
When the music starts playing, naturally the shoving proceeds to get far more forceful, and I glance over at Brittney who is laughing her head off. I see this as a positive sign.
However, just a couple songs in and I suddenly find myself standing on my toes and gasping for breath, desperately trying to find that stream of cool air above from the air conditioning. I've never been in the very front and center area of a floor before that night, and despite the warnings I've recieved, I still never had any idea it would be that brutal.
I suddenly feel Britt grab my arm and I see that even after having a joy attack just a song and a half before, she is not well at ALL--she looks practically on the verge of passing out ALREADY. I don't feel that I'm in that bad of shape just yet, but I know it will be only a matter of minutes before I definintely will be.
The most horrifying thought runs through my head whilst I am being crushed by the surrounding people, all of which for some reason seem to be ENORMOUS: Oh my God...what if I don't make it...and I miss MCR...
I swear to God, at this very moment I reach out and grab Britt by the wrist and begin pulling her out of the chaos and to the left. Not only do I want more than anything to get through Rise Against without passing out or passing on, but I feel terribly responsible for poor Brittney and am determined to get her out.
And I don't know how, but I eventually do. And we see our poor little Jewish "friend", turned away from the stage as she was violently sandwiched between two other people. She had such a look of horror on her face, and I think she tried to reach out for me to save her along with Brittney, but I just got away from her as soon as possible. It reminded me of the lifeboat scenes in Titanic.
AND THANK THE FUCKING LORD WE ARE IN THE CLEARING WITHOUT BEING SHOVED BACK AT ALL.
Not only one of THE highlights of the night but probably of my entire life occured as we made it out: There was a stray mosh girl whipping her stiff curly hair around and punching everyone in her path just outside of the crush zone. As I made my way by her, one of her fists punches into my boob, and I swear I just didn't give a shit, I only wanted out. Brittney sees this occur, however and as she goes by this girl, she SLAMS her right in the jaw, and I mean SLAM. I swear, I've NEVER seen her do anything like that in my life and it was incredible!! I thanked her for it. <3
SO! We were exremely relieved to at last find a non-violent but still AMAZING spot on the left. It was then that Brittney looks down and realizes she's lost one of her Chucks. She doesn't mind because she didn't like them anyway, and thanks me for making her change her brand new Audios.
And so we have a freaking amazing time rocking out and not getting smothered to Rise Against for the next hour. Despite the fact that I know most of their songs, it's still difficult to determine which ones they are playing, which makes me feel like a total doop when I begin screaming out the words to "Give it All" when they're playing "Like the Angel". Most of their songs kind of sound alike to begin with, but MAN did I feel like an idiot... Luckily nobody really noticed or cared because most didn't give a shit for Rise Against and were just kind of standing there, checking their phones for the time when the "real" show would start. It was kind of pathetic to see, but I understand them anyways.
NEVERTHELESS. This band was an AMAZING live act and I would see them again in a fucking heart beat.
8:40 PM
It is turning out to be one hell of a long intermission. With the same three songs on loop again. Somehow we lose our spots within a few minutes but some kindly gentlemen let us step in front of them and we are back in front again. I didn't realize until a few days later the extreme amazingness of our spots until I saw a video of the San Diego show from someone who was in the seats on YouTube and was s-h-o-c-k-e-d at the number of people on the floor.
During the intermission Britt kept nudging me and saying, "LILY LOOK AT ALL THE PEOPLE BACK THERE" but I couldn't see beyond two feet in back of me if I tried and I reminded her, "You tall people can do things like that, not me, mmkay?" I still didn't think there were nearly as many people as I saw on the video. Proves my concert ignornace...
Somewhere in the middle of all this we hear a thundering noise and realize that on the other side of the massive curtain the drums were being sound checked. It probably could have been anyone just hitting each drum and symbol a few times each, but after a little while it was silent, and then a full on drum solo thing was heard, and I swear...It's like Bob was letting us all know it was him. That was crazycrazy for me, to know that only feet away behind that black curtain was the infamous Bob...
So, we are standing for a good 30 minutes playing "I spy" when something funnyyyy happens. These four or five girls in mini-skirts and lipgloss and HUGE ASS Dooney & Bourke purses came strolling up behind us with drinks in their hands and were about to walk up in front when this rocker chick behind us stops them. I recall the scene perfectly.
The leading blonde girl with huge sunglasses on her head: "Hey! We need to get up there."
Rocker chick: (shakes head) "Sorry."
"But we were at the front before we left!"
"Well, you LEFT, that's too bad."
"No, you don't understand, WE WERE JUST AT THE FRONT."
(rocker chick says something that totalllly pzowned her)
*the girls are all pouting and standing there trying to figure out what to do*
Brittney: *pokes one of their huge-ass purses with a hazerdous-looking gold chain, and laughs* You seriously came to THIS show with THIS purse? (or something that sounded cooler than that)
And they all just STORM OFF. I gave Britt a high-five. She was racking up some major points that evening.
Andwhentheyshutoffthelightsandweallheard
8:45 PM
Everybody goes completely nuts when the lights go out and the first few chords to "The End." are heard. Including me. It's finally fucking here.
A spotlight emerges in the center of the stage. And I see it: a hospital bed, which seemed to magically appear out of nowhere, and inside the bed...it was him.
"Now come on, come all, to this tragic affair..."
I screamed along to every single word, and I swear to God I just wanted to fucking cry. He wasn't just close-as-hell, he was there--RIGHT THERE, the one man I've never met that I can honestly say I love to death. It was just him on stage, and I could have sworn it was just me there too.
"I'd encourage your smiles! I'll expect you won't cry!"
WHOOOOOOOOOOSH the gigantic curtain flies open and Gerard tears off the hospital gown and what lay underneath--the infamous Black Parade costume--was better than naked skin, I'll tell you. The stage was insane, and so beautiful. And not to mention, poor Rise Against's mini-stage was like 1/6 the size of theirs.
BUT THAT'S NOT THE FUCKING POINT.
Low and behold, in all their glory, was motherfucking My Chemical Romance. After years...finally.
And it took me a few seconds, but I soon realized I was close enough to Frank Iero to concieve a child with him.
More. Soon. : )
- Mood:
tired
I HAVE DONE IT.
My Chemical Romance. Concert. Screaming. Sweating. Molesting Frank's microphone. Kind of moshing. Jumping. Falling. Getting lost. Deja vu. Dropping $25 on a t-shirt just because. Touching Gerard and/or Frank's water bottle. Suffocating. Laughing. Stuffing confetti in my back pocket. Going deaf. Going mute. Going blind.
And not giving a fuck.
That was the night of March 13th in a nut shell, kids. And yet, somehow...It doesn't come remotely close to describing the evening and all it's glory. Everything...EVERYTHING was perfect. And that's just how it's supposed to be for your first concert of your favorite band, am I right?
So we begin.
2:30 PM
School is out. Praise Jesus. We had an assembly last period that awarded our football team, etc. and Sean Merriman from the Chargers was there. But that's not the point. I WAS FREE.
I got on the phone with dear sweet Brittney, and we both could not seem to find eachother (our campus is monstrous). Somehow we managed to bump into one another and had a good knee-slappin' laugh about it. Although it really was not so humorous, bear in mind we were both high off pure excitement.
Next my brother sees me while driving in his car and, without any summarization of the scene: he drives up, pops the trunk, I grab my overnight crap, close the trunk, and he drives off.
No, he and I are not very close.
Next we see Britt's mama who proceeds to take us to her place. There we leave our stuff and I advise Brittney to change her brand new $80 Audio shoes before we leave.
She asks, "Why? They're comfortable enough."
I respond, "JUST DO IT."
I also change my bright pink sweater to my black one. No need for explanation. ; )
3:40 PM
We are armed with our Starbucks and making our way down to San Diego on my favorite method of transportation, the coaster. We shall arrive in Old Town where we will take the trolley to Britt's dad's work and he will whisk us away to the arena. I am a little worried at this point because by the time we actually arrive at the venue it will be less than 2 hours before doors open (6:30 PM), and I'm just paranoid that there will be a line wrapped around the block when we arrive.
Pssh.
SO. The train and trolley rides are pleasant and soon we are at Brittney's dad's work. His name is Chuck. And Chuck is quite possibly the raddest dude on the face of the earth. Chuck is also a master hair stylist and is indeed a member of the homosexual community. But this really does not matter in the least.
So we're stuck at the salon for AT LEAST 20 minutes with Chuck and Britt just gabbing away with this one client while I'm standing there staring at the clock and trying to picture the vastness of the line at the venue in my head. Not only this, but we were also going to lunch at this Japanese place next door so I was already as impatient as hell.
5:00 PM
I was certain we would be there as of now, and we are only just sitting down for our teriyaki chicken.
However we had very pleasant conversation and the food was excellent and there was this DISTURBING thing on TV about legalizing incest that we conversed about
HOWEVER
it still took up 30 minutes. And after a quick gas stop (ARGH) we are on highway heading toward the arena.
I keep switching tenses, don't I? Sorry. Oh, well.
5:30 PM
Wth funky jazz hip-hop beats blaring from the Explorer, I see the iPayone Center in all its glory as Chuck pulls into the lot right at the top of the hour.
"See! We'll be fine! It's all good," Brittney says to me, pointing at a SHORT line.
Yes...it was short. I was shocked.
And not to mention felt like a damned fool for saying the entire time, "Errr--The line's gonna be miles long if we don't get there a few hours earlyyy...."
Ugh. Anyways, so we sat in the line on the ground for a good hour or so, rating cars that passed from 1-10, until at last the line was moving inside! And that is when a woman with crazy braided hair said over a loudspeaker, "LISTEN! If you have floor tickets, you're in the WRONG LINE." and that was all.
I don't know if we were more pissed that we wasted an hour in the wrong line, or the fact that she never even told us where the CORRECT line was. Bizznitch. So out of the entire line there (which had grown tremendously) it was only Brittney, myself, and a young Asian couple who were snickered at as we cursed and ran around the side of the arena towards another line in the distance.
This line turned out to be *SURPRISE* the wrong one again.
So we ran madly yet again around the building until at last we saw it...the gargantuan GA line.
Despite the fact it was enormous beyond all reason, DO NOT ask me how, but we made it inside in under 10 minutes. I swear to God it was like a time warp or something.
6:45 PM
SO WE ARE IN THE BUILDING.
We run - and I mean RUN, flipping off a fat staff lady who very rudely screams "WALK!" at us - downstairs to the stage. I still remember the rush I got from spying several guitars and amps backstage before we turned the corner and made it to the floor.
This is where I was certain that mystical and uncanny forces of some sort were working their magic on us that evening: THERE WAS MAX. 20-30 KIDS ON THE FLOOR WHEN WE SET FOOT THERE.
So I make a very peculiar breathless-laugh sort of noise of which I probably recieve several sniggers for as we charge it to the VERY FUCKING FRONT AND CENTER (well, we were behind just a few people but it did not matter AT ALL and in fact I didn't even want to be right at the barrier).
Note: Now, we all know, and I certainly had the knowledge well before that moment, that the front and center spot on the floor at a concert is NOT the place to start out if you are like me and do not enjoy suffocation. But I literally did not give a fucking rat's ass right then though because I had never been more excited in my entire fucking life.
So we're standing in our spots for only seconds before that same lady with the rasta braids from before yells out to everyone, "OKAY, SIT DOWN EVERYBODY, SIT DOWN, SIT, SIT, SIT, RELAX." and everyone is really weirded out but we all do so anyways. It was kind of funny actually.
And as soon as we're sitting, Britt checks her phone and says, "Okay, so we're going to be waiting here for another 40 minutes, so I'm going to go get a shirt. Save my spot!" and she's gone like that.
So it's not terribly awkward sitting shoulder-to-shoulder with all of these interesting folk who seem to be making their way to the floor by the dozens every minute...but it's still awkward. Nevertheless, I am very eager to actually have a REAL conversation with a fellow MCR fan or two, as at this point I have failed to do so. I turn to this chubby chap sitting next to me who has a rather bushy pony tail and who I assumed to be his girlfriend on his right.
Smiling like a retard, I ask, "So! How long have you guys been into MCR?"
The girlfriend looks as if she is trying hard not to laugh, and the guy looks at me real weird. He says, "Uhh...You need to ask HER that question."
I'm still to psyched to think straight, or notice that he is wearing a Megadeth shirt.
So I ask his girlfriend and she responds, "Oh, well...I saw them at Nightmare Before Xmas and...yeah...I've been into them since then..." Then she looks at her somewhat disgruntled boyfriend and chuckles to herself.
I didn't even think of what an idiot I was until hours later. But did I really care about that? HELL NO. I was finally there. I made it. And the best night of my life had barely even begun.
OKAY so I will post the good stuff tomorrow. :) Keep in mind that I'm really only making this for me to read (and maybe a certain furry friend of mine in Colorado), especially years from now to look back on. Actually, that's really the reason for this whole LJ thing, too!
Stay tuned!
- Mood:
touched
I've spent most of my time at home making a Happy Birthday video for GerardfreakingWay to put on my MCR Youtube account. Did I ever mention I had one? Here it is. http://youtube.com/profile?user=MyChemic
WHICH REMINDS ME. I'll have that entry of the concert up VERY SOON. Heh.
So speaking of Nina, I took the coaster with she and Hayley on Friday down to Old Town. Why? I have no idea.
Ha, HA. Niners (middle) would probably have a cow and a half if she saw I posted this on here. Muahaha, take THAT. She really is very pretty though when she is not making absurd faces.
This lady was sleeping on the train next to us, and I decided to be creepy and take a picture of her.
So, that's basically all of the pictures from Old Town, sorry. There were a few more unflattering ones that I refuse to post.
OH!!! AND GUESS WHAT! I FINALLY GOT MY FUCKING EYEBROWS DONE TODAY, PRAISE THE LORD!!!
Can you tell? Probably not. But they were a disaster before today. Actually...my right brow looks kind of wacked out, wouldn't you say? And I'm just realizing as I look at this picture that I need new hair, like NOW.
So I think I shall depart and go finish my Gerard video. *cough*
"Good bye, friends!"
...Uh huh, I DID do that and take a picture of it.
- Mood:
creative
Sooo.........................
I want to die.
Maybe. I'm considering it.
I'm doing the worst in school than I have ever done, which is really, really bad. No matter how hard I try, I can't even come close to getting A-N-Y-T-H-I-N-G done. I keep eating way too much and then feel like shit for hours afterwards. I want to shoot everyone around me. Half of my teachers think I'm completely insane (which I am, but their knowledge of it is a bad thing). My family thinks I'm a Satan-worshipper. My friends think I'm totally normal (which is also a bad thing, because they're the ones I need to talk to). I haven't been able to get ANY adequate exercise for the past month. And I think I'm in love.
I swear. God is out to get me. What have I ever done?!
I suppose it's wrong to blame this all on Him...But seriously, I just don't know what's happened to me. I'm so motherfucking depressed. How can you have a mid-life crisis at 15?
I talked to my dad today--yes, TALKED to my dad today. I told him how miserable I feel day in and day out. He acted so shocked. Pssh, makes sense, seeing as he doesn't give a damn about anyone but himself and Magnum P.I. He also told me, "Lily, it's your decision whether you want to be miserable or not."
WHATTHEFUCK.
- Location:Hell.
- Mood:
sick
Bugger I haven't eaten anything solid today and my head hurts and I wish mummy would hurry it up with that stir-fry...
On a more positive note!
Look what came in the mail just over a week ago:
Incase you are visually impaired or are just unable to read it due to the crappy quality, those are my tickets hot off of eBay for
MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE on March 13th, my dears!
OHGODILOVETHATBAND
But the greatest part is, I actually FOUND SOMEONE TODAY to go with me whooYESSS and it's someone I know I'll have a kickass time with! My technical "best friend" of 11 years, Brittney! *applause* I never even thought of her before, seeing as she's more of a "party girl" whose into the hip hoppy sort of scene. But apparently she has been to quite a few large concerts (one an alleged "heavy metal show") and has actually MOSHED in the pits.
She said, and I quote: "Seriously, Lily - even though it's REALLY painful to be in there sometimes with a bunch of bloody guys, it's really a lot of fun! I love it! HEY! Do they have crowdsurfers at My Chemical Romance shows? 'Cause I wanna do that when we go!"
Aww, bless. She really does rock. And even though she is not an attractive male studmuffin with scene hair and vintage wheels, I'm beyond stoked.
Meanwhile...
ONLY 150 MORE DAYS 'TILL HARRY POTTER 7 AND MOVIE 5!!!!
Ooooh! It's that time again! This time I want to actually be waiting for the next book to arrive, which means I have less than 150 days to start and finish The Half-Blood Prince. Ooh best get crack-a-lackin'. And as for the movie - AHH!!! So. Cannot. Wait. I personally thought Book 5 wasn't so great, but come on - it's Harry Potter! It will be another midnight party at the Krikorian, WHOO!
EDIT: God, could that have sounded more geeky?
- Mood:better now that i've eaten
It was actually kind of fun. But while I was vacuuming I started choking on dust bunnies and I ran and got one of them chemical mask things (was happy I could finally put one to good use) which helped a great deal. And it was upon catching my wild-haired, greasy complexion-ed self in the mirror that I thought, "WOW! I look nuts!" And I HAD to take a couple pictures and go all photomanipulation on them. Here's one:
OOH! WILD!
And I love the fact that it shows only 1/4 of my face! Wow I need to get my eyebrows done.
So I did SOMETHING today, at least. But yesterday was a nightmare. Well, more like last night when I was trying to get some shut-eye and my brother had his girlfriend over, AGAIN...Now, mind you - we have an ajoining bathroom with cheap-ass sliding doors that hardly block out shit unless both are closed. Mine is always closed because that bathroom is grotesque, but he has an awfully annoying habit of leaving his open, thus driving me mad with his loud music at all hours and when he has his friends over and such.
Well when that happens, I, naturally, just close his door and go about my business.
So I don't know WHY, but he did not close his bathroom door last night when he had his girlfriend over. And usually when they're just "watching a movie" or laughing really loudly or something I just get up, go through the bathroom and shut his door to block out the noise.
But last night.
The noise coming from his room.
Was anything but innocent.
...I won't go into detail.
I came to the assumption that he left his bathroom door open because he obviously assumed I wasn't home...when I really was...
And I heard everything.
UGH.
I could have easily gotten up and just closed his door but then OBVIOUSLY they would know I was here, and that I could hear EVERYTHING. So, I just lay there, trying desperately to muffle the noise out with a heavy down pillow, but it really was no use. So I wound up listening to my iPod for the next two hours until I finally heard them leave.
OHGOD. I never, ever want to go through an experience like that again. I nearly hurled over the side of my bed. See, it's WAY different when it's your crazy-ass stoner neighbors gettin' it on at 2 AM - but when it's your brother and his Puruvian girlfriend with the teaching major? Bitchplease, spare me.
Brother Dearest [gay]
- Mood:
drained
